


Counting out the time (I hope this lasts)

by bangyababy



Series: Happy Steve Bingo [3]
Category: Captain America (Movies), Captain America - All Media Types
Genre: Bucky Barnes Needs a Hug, Bucky Barnes Recovering, Fluff and Angst, Happy Steve Bingo, M/M, Non-Sexual Intimacy, Steve Rogers Feels, Steve Rogers Needs a Hug, Touch Aversion, Touch-Starved, aggressive hand holding
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-11-08
Updated: 2018-11-08
Packaged: 2019-08-20 14:27:06
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,000
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16557467
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bangyababy/pseuds/bangyababy
Summary: Bucky watches him form a moment, then moves to stand up. “Well, next time we’ll go together.”Steve gives him a small smile. “I’d like that.”And then Bucky gives him a friendly punch on the arm and gets off the couch like it’s a normal day, and he hasn’t just touched Steve in a non-violent manner for the first time since 1945 and goes to take a nap.Steve holds on to what he's got.





	Counting out the time (I hope this lasts)

**Author's Note:**

> Written for the Happy Steve Bingo fill "non-sexual intimacy." I'm not super happy with this one, but here we go!

When Steve first brought Bucky in from the cold, Bucky said exactly three words and allowed himself to be moved from room to room like a paper doll, waiting for Steve to come pick him up and play with him. As time wore on, and Bucky began to understand that Steve was  _ not _ his handler, Bucky began to shirk away from Steve’s hands. 

But with Bucky’s aversion to touch came his voice, and Steve counted that as progress. It started off with simple yes’s and no’s about things he liked or wanted and eventually transformed into requests, and finally into actual conversations. 

Eight months later, Bucky can sit with at least six other people in a room, can make small talk with the barista at Starbucks, and he can even go outside of his and Steve’s apartment by himself for a few hours. But he still hates to be touched. 

So it takes Steve by surprise when Bucky comes home from one of his solo excursions and sits down right next to Steve on the couch. They're not touching, but it’s damn near close. 

“What’d you get up to, Buck?” Steve asks. 

“Went down to the Met,” Bucky grunts.

Steve’s a little disappointed that he didn’t get to go with Bucky on that particular trip but still perks up at the idea that Bucky had even thought to go there. “See anything you like?” 

“Didn’t go inside. Didn’t even mean to go there. I was just walking and before I knew it, there I was on the steps.” He laughs and looks at Steve. “Musta been muscle memory.” 

Steve laughs, too. “I probably dragged you down there at least twice a month for all of 1932.” Steve looks away then. “Don’t think I’ve been back there since…” 

Bucky watches him for a moment, then moves to stand up. “Well, next time we’ll go together.” 

Steve gives him a small smile. “I’d like that.” 

And then Bucky gives him a friendly punch on the arm and gets off the couch like it’s a normal day, and he hasn’t just touched Steve in a non-violent manner for the first time since 1945 and goes to take a nap. Steve stares after him for a long time, rubbing his shoulder from here it still tingles from Bucky’s touch. 

It keeps happening. Steve knows Bucky is testing the waters so he never tries to touch him first. There are more friendly punches, a few hip bumps, some high-fives, a lot of legs resting next to each other on the couch, and once after Steve did something particularly reckless on a mission, Bucky had grabbed him by the shoulders and  _ shook _ .  

Steve makes a mental count of Bucky’s little touches. It’s a little sad, but before Bucky fell he can’t a remember a time when they  _ weren’t  _ touching. He knows that Bucky’s different now, so is Steve, but he misses that easy affection so fiercely it doesn’t even make sense to him. 

It’s the end of June when Bucky asks him to go out with him that day. 

“Sure,” Steve agrees easily. “Where we going?” 

“I don’t know,” Bucky says, and he’s lying, but Steve doesn’t push. “Thought we might just wander.”

Steve smiles. “Yeah, sounds fun.” 

They take the 5 to 86 St. and Steve knows where they’re going, but doesn’t say anything. Bucky is getting more anxious as they walk, his shoulders tensing up and his steps unnaturally measured. But Steve still keeps up their favorite game, which is just making up stories about obvious tourists. 

Steve is just finishing a tale about a Texas oilman that Bucky is pretty sure he stole from some old TV show when they happen upon the Met. 

“Oh!” Steve exclaims. 

Bucky, who is already stomping up the steps, shoots Steve an unimpressed look. “Shut up, Steve.” 

Steve grins and follows Bucky up the steps. “I’m happy we’re here,” he tells Bucky as they wait in the ticket line.

“Too fucking smart for your own good,” Bucky grumbles under his breath as he steps up to the counter, pushing Steve’s proffered wallet out of the way. His whole demeanor changes when he sees the old woman behind the counter. Bucky leans forward, all swagger and charm and says, “Hiya, sweetheart, can we get two senior tickets, please?” He jerks his metal thumb towards Steve. 

“Young man,” the woman starts, then catches sight of Bucky’s arm and Steve giggling. “Jesus Christ!” 

Bucky laughs. “Nah, just Captain America.” 

“Wait’ll I tell Elenor about this,” the woman says to herself as she gets their tickets. “That’ll be 34 dollars, please.” 

Bucky hands her a hundred dollar bill. “Keep the change, doll,” he tells her with a wink. 

Bucky is tense as again as soon as they hand their tickets over. He stands in the atrium, looking for some unknown enemey. “Wanna see the statues first?” Steve asks.  

“Yeah,” Bucky replies, but it’s distracted and suddenly Steve is wondering if he should call an Uber and get Bucky home. Maybe this was too much for one day. 

But then Bucky is turning to him, his face determined, and grabbing Steve’s hand with his own. He twines their fingers together and stares at Steve the whole time, daring him to say something. 

Steve looks down at their hands then to Bucky’s defensive face and blinks back tears. Bucky softens and he gives Steve’s hand a squeeze. “Come on, punk.” He pulls him towards the Greek and Roman wing. 

“Yeah, yeah, you jerk,” Steve sniffles, but lets himself be pulled. They walk the whole museum like that, hand in hand, and even on the subway. They finally pull away when they get home and Steve immediately misses it. 

But later when they settle in on the couch, Bucky comes to sit next to him and twines their fingers together again. Steve realizes that he’s lost count but when Bucky runs his thumb over the back of his hand he decides he doesn’t care. 

**Author's Note:**

> Like I said, not super happy with this one, but thank you for reading! 
> 
> You can find me on [tumblr](http://bangyababy.tumblr.com)!


End file.
